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Lessons From Carolyn Heckert


Carolyn has never been convicted of a murder, so we can not legally call her a murderer. Regardless there are lessons we can learn from her story. When she was a teen, her ex-boyfriend, Matt Uland began dating Sarah De Leon, who was later found stabbed to death. It made national news when charges were filed against her in the case from 1989. Unfortunately for the victim's family, a judge dismissed those charges against her due to lack of evidence, which did not make national news. The good news/bad news about this event is that it doesn't constitute double jeopardy, but rather means she can be tried at a later date when more evidence becomes available. The bad news is Sarah's family must wait even longer for justice and justice delayed certainly feels like justice denied.

Years later, Carolyn had an affair with Tim Ault, whose wife, Diana Ault, was found shot in her kitchen dead, with her four year old son witnessing the murder. He had recently ended the affair prior to the murder. There is in fact evidence of the threatening behavior of Carolyn towards both women. Hopefully in the future, further DNA advances will make these cases provable. There is a world of difference between what police know and what can be proven in court.

We've all known women like this actually. I met a young man years ago who was funny and charming. We clicked and had great raport. One day he told me the story of how his ex-wife tried to run him over in his front yard with a vehicle which is where our relationship ended. A woman like that will never leave you in peace with what they consider to be their personal property. Women like this never give up or back down. They will harass you endlessly, possibly even after the relationship ends. The first hint that there is a legitimately crazy ex who has committed acts of violence, stalking or harassment it's time to end the relationship or avoid beginning one.

If you hear constant stories of a crazy ex with no proof is also a huge red flag. This is a ploy of both sexes to cover their own bad behavior in the previous relationship. If you hear lots of stories, but never personally witness anything or see a text or an email, chances are good the ex is actually the victim of the souless person in front of you and you should also end the relationship or avoid it.

But I digress, back to Carolyn.

What you should take away from this story is simple. Let's say she's had a total of ten relationships including her current marriage. If you chose to date her ex, there is a 20% chance you will end up murdered. If you consider the risk/reward scenario of this case she only picks men with whom relationships do not last (Though in their defense, she does come off a bit crazy) and there is a 20% chance you will end up dead with no more life to live. If I were a woman in her community of Smithville, Missouri I would never speak a word to her husband, not one. I wouldn't even say hello.

Perhaps we can not say definitively she is a murderer at this point in time, but at the end of the day, the truth as can be proven, is out there. The court of public opinion is not kind (sometimes not fairly so). We are aware of the odds against her and those who chose to see her ex's. Her reputation is in shambles and no doubt her husband has been impacted. Let's wait and see what 2019 brings us in regard to this case!
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